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By Deborrah Cooper

Why do women enter relationships? There is no one reason that applies to everyone, because at different stages of life women are seeking different things from men. But the top three reasons given by single women: (1) love; (2) to share our lives with a partner (companionship); and (3) fun.

What Your Woman Wants From Your Relationship
I can”t tell you how many women (married or in an otherwise committed relationship), have complained about how their man changed “once he got me.” The cordial gentlemanly behaviors, the bathing, the haircuts, the romantic attention, all die a slow and painful death. The effort a man put out to get her onto his team comes to a screeching halt once he is confident that she is his.

That guys, is a huge mistake.

Love: Brownie Points and Demerits
It’’s important for men to understand that TELLING a woman that you love her is only part of the equation. You have to not only tell her often, you need to SHOW her in a variety of ways, and you need to do it pretty much every day. That way you become not only her romantic interest, you become her rock, her hero, her trusted “go to” person that takes care of her, the man that she feels is the best guy in the world and that she wouldn”t want to ever do without. By doing at least one thing just for her every day, you keep your “love brownie points” level really high.

That means you need to try really, really hard to avoid letting her down. Ever.

Women Don”t Break Up With You Out of Nowhere!
Men go along thinking that everything in their relationship is fine, as long as their needs are getting met. They ignore their woman’’s requests for input and problem solving, for assistance, for time, for affection. Men often feel that if they are happy and satisfied with things, then everyone is.

That guys, is a huge mistake.

See, every time you disappoint your woman, you become a little less of a hero in her eyes. Every time she asks for your assistance and you deny her request, you are abandoning her. And every time you abandon her to “do it herself” a chunk is removed from that “rock” that you have been in her eyes. Every time you lie to her, the trust she has in you dies a little. Every time she wants to talk and be with you, and you totally ignore her until you want sex, your relationship takes a hit.

Little by little, your woman draws away from you emotionally, until one day she realizes that she is no longer in love with you. She is ready to go and you are shocked because in your eyes, women are crazy and she just “suddenly” left you for no reason.

The Difference Between Needing and Neediness
There is a huge difference between a woman that needs you, and a needy woman.

Needy women are clingy, insecure and high maintenance. Not many men choose that type of woman, and we aren”t talking about them.

We are talking about the hard working, together woman you chose because she was smart, funny, strong, independent, hot and sexy, and made you feel really good when you were around her. Though she is fully capable of doing what she does by herself, why should she have to? Why is it so difficult for men to differentiate between a woman that needs you, and a needy woman?

Lazy men love to slap that “independent woman” label on their wife or girlfriend when she asks for help. But dude, you need to be very aware of the slippery slope to singleness you are on with that self-centered attitude.

A true partnership is formed when you have each other’’s back. But if you are one of those guys that expects your relationship to always be about you and what you want, demanding to have everything when you want it and how you want it, you need to grow up!

Your woman needs to depend on you to be a kind and thoughtful leader, and to do the right thing as a Super Hero always does. Demonstrate your love for your woman by being willing to go the extra mile to rescue and support her in times of need. When she asks for your help, give it without reservation and without 101 excuses why it isn”t the right thing to do, it isn”t logical or necessary in your opinion. Instead of making weak excuses, get your butt up and get busy helping her; she and your relationship need your assistance.

The smart man holds his woman’’s hands, heart and spirit in his with loving tenderness. The smart man, treating his “independent” woman with respect and consideration, easily “dump proofs” his relationship!

About The Author

Deborrah is a dating expert whose columns appear on http://www.askheartbeat.com. Also author of the dating guide “Sucka Free Love” and the host of an Internet radio talk show on http://www.BlogTalkRadio.com/askheartbeat, which airs on Wednesday nights at 7:00 pm (PST)

By Alexander Stern

I”ve asked some people in my marriage compatibility mailing list, wanting to know about their marriage compatibility difficulties and things they would like to hear about it. I have had a lot of responses to that email, so it seems great idea to answer the 3 of the questions that I found common in this article. Here you go.

1) How to be sure my spouse really loves me?

Ok. I”ll try to be very tactful here. What about this - if you truly loves a guy or a girl what would you do to prove that? How would you make it clear for your spouse to get it that you really feel all warm and loving about him or her?

Basically - you try to show your liking toward that person, right? You demonstrate that it is interesting what that person tells you, maybe even look up at the person for something and certainly care in whatever happens to that person. Your eyes sparkle when looking at the significant one. You seem very enthusiastic be just two of you with the guy or girl.

Do you feel that kind of loving from your partner? Is there some kind of interest in you? Convey sympathy? Come on and test your feelings.

2) How to bring more of affection in our relationship?

True love basically depends on really agreeing and I would say admire what you see in the other person and what he or she tells you. So, you can try to look good for your partner and ALSO try to be more interesting for your partner. Make notes what your partner likes in the way you look and improve it. And, on the contrary, you might consider hiding the things that your partner prefers not to see in you.

I am not telling about becoming obsessed on being exactly what other people consider that you should be, because there lays depression and hard time getting other people to like you. No, I”m talking about having your guys” time together as pleasantly and enjoyable to both of you as possible.

And I certainly propose you give compliments to things you adore about your partner. And, on the contrary, suggest some small betterment, but very gently and never demanding. As in: “You know, that tie would look so nice on you, why wouldn”t you try it on you?”

I talk more in my free marriage compatibility report to know more about being fascinating to your partner.

3) The toughest thing about keeping a relationship alive is not to get annoyed on your partner.

I certainly agree with that. Judging by the experience I gained, a person can react to things, which kind of look to him like some bad things that he experienced in the past. And those reactions can happen with no control over them from his part.

One good thing about it - the more rested we are and the better our temper is, the less is the possibility that such outbursts can happen to us. So my suggestion is - rest more and do your best to keep your temper in good shape. I”ll give some good advice on this in my future articles.

About The Author

Alexander Stern is an expert in relationship compatibility testing and improvement. Download his FREE Relationship Compatibility Report from http://www.RelationshipCompatibilityReport.com and visit the http://www.Relationship-Compatibility-Advice.com Blog